# The Rookie Captain

> Free Boat. Big Dreams. Zero Experience.


## Posts

- [MerCruiser 260 Oil Capacity, Filter & Oil Type (Cheat Sheet)](https://therookiecaptain.com/mercruiser-260-oil-capacity/): You want the MerCruiser 260 oil capacity, not my life story, so here's the table first. The jokes come after.
- [How to Winterize a Boat with an Inboard Motor: A Rookie's MerCruiser 350 Walkthrough](https://therookiecaptain.com/winterize-inboard-boat-mercruiser-350/): If you've typed how to winterize a boat with inboard motor into Google at 11 p.m. while the forecast threatens frost, welcome. Pull up a bucket.
- [How to Clean Boat Battery Terminals (Without Electrocuting Yourself)](https://therookiecaptain.com/how-to-clean-boat-battery-terminals/): A while back I opened the battery compartment on my free 33-foot Chris-Craft and found what I can only describe as an archaeological site: corroded terminals, crusty connections, and wires that had clearly seen things.
- [Boat Safety Checklist for Beginners (Free PDF)](https://therookiecaptain.com/boat-safety-checklist-pdf/): Confession: the first time I read the required-gear table in Transport Canada's Safe Boating Guide, I thought "radar reflector" was a joke about my sunglasses.
- [First Time Boat Owner Checklist: What I Wish I'd Checked Before Saying Yes to a Free Boat](https://therookiecaptain.com/first-time-boat-owner-checklist/): Somebody asked me, "Want a free boat?" and I said yes before my brain caught up with my mouth.
- [Below Deck: A Tour of the Free Boat's Insides](https://therookiecaptain.com/below-deck-tour/): The outside looks like a giant marshmallow. The inside? Honestly… not bad.
- [Meet the Twin 350s (One of Whom Needs Therapy)](https://therookiecaptain.com/meet-the-mercruiser-260/): Every boat has a heart. Mine has two: twin 350s. The engine tag says MerCruiser 260, 350 cubic inches — and neither has fired up in years.
- [Battery Archaeology: What I Found in the Bilge](https://therookiecaptain.com/battery-archaeology/): Today's dig site: the battery compartment. What I found can only be described as "historical."
- [I Got a Free Boat. Here's What "Free" Means.](https://therookiecaptain.com/free-boat-what-free-means/): It started with a simple question: "Want a free boat?" I said yes before my brain caught up with my mouth.

## Pages

- [Privacy Policy](https://therookiecaptain.com/privacy/): Last updated: November 6, 2026.
- [Contact](https://therookiecaptain.com/contact/): Sponsorships, collabs, boat advice, parts leads, or just want to say ahoy? Drop a message in the bottle.
- [About](https://therookiecaptain.com/about/): I'm a first-time boat owner who said yes to a free 33-foot Chris-Craft before I knew what I was getting into.
- [Help Float the Boat](https://therookiecaptain.com/help-float-the-boat/): A 33ft Chris-Craft is sitting on land, shrink-wrapped, fully stripped down, waiting.
- [Free Resources](https://therookiecaptain.com/free-resources/): Free stuff for fellow rookies — real articles from the Restoration Log, plus the email list for launch-day news.
- [Rookie Guides](https://therookiecaptain.com/rookie-guides/): Digital guides for new boaters, written in plain English by someone who just learned it the hard way. Instant PDF download after checkout.
- [Watch](https://therookiecaptain.com/watch/): New videos and Shorts from the boatyard, the bilge and occasionally the bottom of a toolbox.
- [Restoration Log](https://therookiecaptain.com/restoration-log/)
- [The Boat](https://therookiecaptain.com/the-boat/): Power: Twin 350s (MerCruiser 260, 350 CID). One of them definitely needs work.
- [Home](https://therookiecaptain.com/): It came fully stripped down — the last owner planned a rebuild and never did it.
- [My account](https://therookiecaptain.com/my-account/)
- [Checkout](https://therookiecaptain.com/checkout/)
- [Cart](https://therookiecaptain.com/cart/)
- [Shop](https://therookiecaptain.com/shop/)

## Products

- [If Lost, Return Me to My Boat Koozie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/if-lost-return-me-to-my-boat-koozie/): Our If Lost, Return Me to My Boat artwork, now as a koozie. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [If Lost, Return Me to My Boat Sticker](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/if-lost-return-me-to-my-boat-sticker/): Our If Lost, Return Me to My Boat artwork, now as a sticker. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [If Lost, Return Me to My Boat Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/if-lost-return-me-to-my-boat-mug/): Our If Lost, Return Me to My Boat artwork, now as a mug. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Kiss Me Where It's Wet Koozie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/kiss-me-where-its-wet-koozie/): Our Kiss Me Where It's Wet artwork, now as a koozie. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Kiss Me Where It's Wet Sticker](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/kiss-me-where-its-wet-sticker/): Our Kiss Me Where It's Wet artwork, now as a sticker. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Kiss Me Where It's Wet Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/kiss-me-where-its-wet-mug/): Our Kiss Me Where It's Wet artwork, now as a mug. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Ass, Gas, or Deck Space Koozie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/ass-gas-or-deck-space-koozie/): Our Ass, Gas, or Deck Space artwork, now as a koozie. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Ass, Gas, or Deck Space Sticker](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/ass-gas-or-deck-space-sticker/): Our Ass, Gas, or Deck Space artwork, now as a sticker. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Ass, Gas, or Deck Space Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/ass-gas-or-deck-space-mug/): Our Ass, Gas, or Deck Space artwork, now as a mug. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Captain Hungover Koozie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-hungover-koozie/): Our Captain Hungover artwork, now as a koozie. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Captain Hungover Sticker](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-hungover-sticker/): Our Captain Hungover artwork, now as a sticker. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Captain Hungover Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-hungover-mug/): Our Captain Hungover artwork, now as a mug. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Sunk Happens Koozie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/sunk-happens-koozie/): Our Sunk Happens artwork, now as a koozie. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Sunk Happens Sticker](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/sunk-happens-sticker/): Our Sunk Happens artwork, now as a sticker. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Sunk Happens Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/sunk-happens-mug/): Our Sunk Happens artwork, now as a mug. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [I Like Buoys. Big Ones. Koozie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/i-like-buoys-big-ones-koozie/): Our I Like Buoys artwork, now as a koozie. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [I Like Buoys. Big Ones. Sticker](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/i-like-buoys-big-ones-sticker/): Our I Like Buoys artwork, now as a sticker. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [I Like Buoys. Big Ones. Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/i-like-buoys-big-ones-mug/): Our I Like Buoys artwork, now as a mug. Same bad jokes, new surface.
- [Rookie Mechanic Hoodie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/rookie-mechanic-hoodie/): Wrench in one hand, phone with the YouTube tutorial in the other.
- [I Survived the Rookie Captain Hoodie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/i-survived-the-rookie-captain-hoodie/): Proof you went out on the boat and lived to tell the story.
- [Keep Calm and F***ing Sail Black Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/keep-calm-and-fing-sail-black-mug/): Explicit language. Calm is optional, sailing is mandatory.
- [Rookie Captain Can Cooler](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/rookie-captain-can-cooler/): Regular or slim, it keeps it cold while you keep it together.
- [Rookie Captain Rocks Glass](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/rookie-captain-rocks-glass/): For the post-repair drink that you definitely earned.
- [Captain, I'm F***ing Awesome Tank Top](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-im-fing-awesome-tank-top/): Explicit language. Confidence of a captain, skills of a rookie.
- [Nauti as F*ck Crop Top](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/nauti-as-fck-crop-top/): Explicit language. Fitted all-over-print crop top for the party boat.
- [Rookie Captain Dad Hat](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/rookie-captain-dad-hat/): The low-key dad cap for captains with high-key boat problems.
- [Captain's Beard & F***ing Cheers Bucket Hat](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captains-beard-fing-cheers-bucket-hat/): Explicit language. Sun protection with attitude.
- [Rookie Captain Travel Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/rookie-captain-travel-mug/): 25 oz of coffee for the drive to the boatyard. You'll need all of it.
- [Captain's Cheers Can Cooler](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captains-cheers-can-cooler/): Keeps your drink cold while the engine stays stubbornly cold too.
- [Life's a B*tch, Then You Sail Flag](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/lifes-a-btch-then-you-sail-flag/): Explicit language. Hang it where the neighbours can't miss it.
- [Nauti as F*ck Flag](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/nauti-as-fck-flag/): Explicit language. Fly it from the bow, the dorm room or the garage where the boat actually lives.
- [Drunk, High & F***ing Sailing Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/drunk-high-fing-sailing-tee/): Explicit language. Steel-blue tee for unapologetic sailors.
- [Drunk, High & F***ing Sailing Tank Top](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/drunk-high-fing-sailing-tank-top/): Explicit language. Sleeveless, so the sunburn is even.
- [Drunk, High & F***ing Sailing Black Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/drunk-high-fing-sailing-black-mug/): Explicit language. A glossy black mug for captains who don't do subtle.
- [May the Shots Be Ever in Your Favor Pint Glass](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/may-the-shots-be-ever-in-your-favor-pint-glass/): The odds are bad, but the shots are good.
- [Cheers, B*tches Pint Glass](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/cheers-btches-pint-glass/): Explicit language. Drink like a boss, captain like a rookie.
- [Booze & Badasses Shaker Pint Glass](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/booze-badasses-shaker-pint-glass/): Explicit language. A pint glass with opinions.
- [Booze & Badasses Two-Tone Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/booze-badasses-two-tone-mug/): Coloured-inside ceramic mug for coffee, rum or both.
- [Life Is Short, Sail Naked Organic Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/life-is-short-sail-naked-organic-tee/): Life is short. Make questionable choices on the water (clothing still recommended at the fuel dock).
- [Captain's Orders Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captains-orders-jersey/): Captain's orders: drink, sail, repeat. Explicit language on the print.
- [Kiss My Deck, You Salty B*tch Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/kiss-my-deck-you-salty-btch-tee/): Explicit-ish. For when the dock neighbour critiques your docking one more time.
- [Liquid Courage for Salty Souls Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/liquid-courage-for-salty-souls-mug/): Whatever's in it, it's helping you face that engine.
- [Captain of Caffeine Mug (No F***ing Excuses)](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-caffeine-mug-no-fing-excuses/): Explicit language, honest fuel. For captains who don't talk before coffee.
- [Anchors Aweigh… and Shots Away Women's Relaxed Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/anchors-aweigh-and-shots-away-womens-relaxed-tee/): Anchor up, shot glasses out. Nautical tradition, loosely interpreted.
- [Captain of the S.S. Drunk Women's Relaxed Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-the-s-s-drunk-womens-relaxed-tee/): She's the captain, the beer is the first mate, and the ship is the S.S. Drunk.
- [Captain of the Booze Cruise Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-the-booze-cruise-jersey/): Floating bar, questionable captain, excellent vibes. All aboard.
- [Sunk Happens Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/sunk-happens-jersey/): Boats sink, beers float, the duck survives. Wear your optimism.
- [Captain of Bad Decisions Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-bad-decisions-jersey/): Bought a boat. Kept the boat. Named himself captain. Bad decisions all the way down.
- [I Like My Boats Like My Nights: Wet & Wild Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/i-like-my-boats-like-my-nights-wet-wild-jersey/): Neon lights, moonlit water and questionable decisions after dark.
- [Kiss Me Where It's Wet Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/kiss-me-where-its-wet-jersey/): A cheeky mermaid with a sign and a plan. Mostly the ocean, we swear.
- [Ass, Gas, or Deck Space Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/ass-gas-or-deck-space-jersey/): No one boats for free. Pay your fuel share or start scrubbing the deck.
- [Captain Hungover Reporting for Duty Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-hungover-reporting-for-duty-jersey/): Reporting for duty at the crack of noon. Sunglasses mandatory, questions not welcome.
- [Docked and Dangerous Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/docked-and-dangerous-jersey/): Never left the dock, still caused trouble. Peak rookie behaviour.
- [I Like Buoys. Big Ones. Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/i-like-buoys-big-ones-jersey/): A cheeky pin-up classic for anyone who appreciates proper navigational markers.
- [Let's Get Shipfaced Party Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/lets-get-shipfaced-party-jersey/): The party-boat edition of our best seller. Dock-party approved, please captain responsibly.
- [If Lost, Return Me to My Boat Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/if-lost-return-me-to-my-boat-jersey/): Contains a rookie captain. If found wandering the marina, please return to the boat that doesn't run yet.
- [Nauti, Lit & Afloat Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/nauti-lit-afloat-jersey/): Flamingo floatie, cold drink, zero plans. The rookie-captain dream, printed on a jersey.
- [Captain of the Shipwrecked & Shameless Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-the-shipwrecked-shameless-jersey/): For the captain who ran aground, laughed about it, and ordered another round.
- [Drunk on a Boat Is Still Technically Navigation Jersey](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/drunk-on-a-boat-is-still-technically-navigation-jersey/): If the boat is moving and you're on it, you're navigating. That's just maritime law (it is not maritime law).
- [The Complete Rookie Kit: All 4 Guides (PDF Bundle)](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/the-complete-rookie-kit-all-4-guides-pdf-bundle/): All four Rookie Captain PDF guides in one download: First Boat Survival Guide, Safety Checklist, Restoration Budget Planner and Hull & Deck Repair Playbook.
- [Hull & Deck Repair Playbook (PDF)](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/hull-deck-repair-playbook-pdf/): 9-page beginner playbook for fibreglass and gelcoat repair basics, with safety first.
- [Restoration Budget Planner (PDF)](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/restoration-budget-planner-pdf/): 11-page planner to plan, quote and track a boat restoration budget before the boat eats your wallet.
- [The Rookie Captain's Safety Checklist (PDF)](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/the-rookie-captains-safety-checklist-pdf/): 7-page printable pre-launch safety checklist for power boats 9–12 m, so you know what has to be on board before you leave the dock.
- [The Rookie Captain's First Boat Survival Guide (PDF)](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/the-rookie-captains-first-boat-survival-guide-pdf/): 18-page PDF: what to inspect before you say yes to a "free" boat, battery basics, recommissioning an old cruiser and the Canadian safety gear you actually need.
- [My Boat, My Rules, Your Sobriety Optional Women's Relaxed Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/my-boat-my-rules-your-sobriety-optional-womens-relaxed-tee/): Captain's orders: relax. Relaxed-fit women's tee in nine colours for the first mate who actually knows what she's doing.
- [Captain of the Struggle Boat Hoodie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-the-struggle-boat-hoodie/): The struggle boat is real, and it's cold out there. Premium heavyweight hoodie for captains whose vessel spends more time on blocks than in the water.
- [Let's Get Ship-Faced Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/lets-get-shipfaced-tee/): Hyphen included for the grammar nerds on board. Same great bad idea, same soft tee. Eight colours, XS to 5XL.
- [Captain of the Struggle Tee](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/captain-of-the-struggle-tee/): Promoted to captain with zero experience and a boat that fights back. Wear your rank proudly. Soft unisex tee, 7 colours, XS to 5XL.
- [Let's Get Shipfaced Hoodie](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/lets-get-shipfaced-hoodie/): For the cold nights on deck when the heater is "in progress" (it's not). Heavyweight premium hoodie that's warmer than any part of our boat's electrical system.
- [Coffee: The True Captain's Secret Mug](https://therookiecaptain.com/product/coffee-the-true-captains-secret-mug/): Every great captain runs on two things: diesel and coffee. One of them is cheaper. Glossy ceramic mug, dishwasher and microwave safe, and strong enough to survive the 6 a.m. "why won't it start" phase of boat ownership.


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